Thursday, January 14, 2010

At the End of the Day

This is a year full of excitement for my family.  But it has also brought some challenges and struggles, and we're only 2 weeks into the new year.  I have recently been struggling over things that are being said about me - most recently on facebook.  I want so bad to defend myself, defend my family.  There are two sides to every story (always remember this).  But, that's not what God has in mind.  He told me to be silent.  Ugh...not really what I wanted to hear :).  For me that's easier said than done.  As I type this I could cry over this whole situation.  But, it's at times like these (when I'm on the verge of tears) that I'm reminded of Jesus, and all those who betrayed Him, all at the same time.  I can't even imagine.  

So, I prayed some more.  I over and over heard God tell me to be the silent one.  And then, I heard Him tell me that, I had to defend my actions to noone other than HIM.  We are not perfect - after all, we are human - but we are forgiven.  If my actions and motives are right, in the sight of God, then what else really matters.  At the end of the day, at the end of my life, He will judge me, and the ONLY one I am accountable to is HIM.

If you are struggling with judgement, like I am, take heart. Jesus knows what it feels like and He did it for us. As much as I believe what God has spoken to me, and know it will be ok, it stills brings so much pain. So, I'll keep praying he replaces my tears with joy.


Kimmie said...

I'm sorry. May God bind up your wounds.

Rebecca said...

I'm sorry dear. You are wonderful - I like U just as you are :-)
We are all in the process of growing. Mean people stink.

KatelynWaite said...

Sorry to hear this Kristine. You're a great person and a wonderful mommy. I know it's easy to 'know' all the answers (being silent) and another thing to act them out. I pray wisdom & peace for you my friend.


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